Fade
by Olympic Gold Penguin
Summary: "I am chilled and sorrowful. My smiles fake and laughs broken. I will not fade; I am fading." The night of King Elessar and Queen Arwen's wedding takes an unexpected turn as one elf's grief turns out to be too much.


**Disclaimer: **The following is a non-profit fan-based story, not intended to benifit myself in any way. All rights reserved to the author, J.R.R. Tolkien, and partially Peter Jackson (for using things found only in his movies).

**Warnings: **Implied death, major character death, unrequited homosexual love, possible character bashing, things that aren't true (as the entire story is really fanfiction).

**Word count: **1642

**Characters: **Legolas, Gandalf, Aragorn, Arwen

**Text guide: **Normal; "Speach"; _-Memories/Heavy feelings- ; "Elvish"_

* * *

><p><em>-Fade-<em>

Legolas watched the guests leave, one-by-one, two-by-twos, and sometimes up to six-by-sevens. They all stopped themselves to politely congratulate the newlyweds- the king and queen of Gondor. And how funnily it was that they completed each other, forming one whole inseparable being- a being Legolas hated half of, yet loved the other.

_-Legolas walked out to the garden of Gondor, too emotionally exhausted to take off his fake smile of congratulations. Aragorn and Arwen had announced the date of the wedding, sending Gondor into a frenzy by doing so. Every smile, "Congratulations!", hug, and laugh was sincere._

_Every smile save his own.-_

Legolas felt a hand on his shoulder, he turned around to see the beaming face of the Evenstar.

"_Mae g'ovannen_, Legolas!" She smiled.

Legolas stiffened in the slightest, most subtle way, before breaking into his all-too-common _lying grin_, for _real smiles_ were reserved for Gondor's king, and the king alone.

"Lady Arwen," Legolas greeted, warm as a frozen flame.

"I am quite relieved that nothing worse than poor Gimli smashing some wine bottles had occurred." Arwen commented, and with this dish served was a side of laughter, alike to silver bells.

Idly, yet achingly, Legolas wondered if Aragorn ever had compared his laughter to some jingling trinker, or clanging metal instrument.

_-"And her _laugh_, Legolas," Strider sighed, acting like some love drunk mortal (though, to his defense, that's exactly what he was)._

_"What of her laugh?" Legolas asked, feeling only the slightest _pinch _in his heart rather than a full on_ punch_._

_"It reminds me of the silver bells my mother used to make windchimes."_

_"Very pretty," Legolas nodded, barely paying attention._

_"Legolas?" Strider asked. "Legolas, you're not even paying attention- Legolas! Legolas!"-_

One blink. Two blink. No jump or yelp, just a tint of a reddish coloring.

"Aye? My apologies, I drifted to another time." Legolas covered.

Aragorn gave him a soft smile- a smile the king felt the need to share with all- and spoke gently, "Well, you are summoned back to this time. Gandalf requests your presence."

Legolas nodded and searched for the meddling old coot.

"Sit," A voice gently demanded from behind him.

Legolas sat next to the maia before striking conversation.

"You asked for me?" Legolas asked.

"Did I?" The wizard speculated. "Oh yes- I remember now. Tell me, son of Thranduil, how is it that you an King Elessar came to meet?"

Legolas looked at Gandalf for a minute, then recalled the tale he'd not forgotten...

"The first time Aragorn ever laid eyes on me... I was in a net- captured."

_-Legolas walked swiftly across the forest, trying to attract little attention as possible.-_

"After the Battle of the Five Armies, my father sent me to find a ranger who went by the name of Strider..."

_-The trees whispered to Legolas safe paths- where to step and where to leap. When to remain in the trees and when to investigate the ground. Legolas had made it rather far by lsitening to these trees, yet they did _not _detect one large and hidden trap.-_

"I had scouted around from the trees, but Aragorn's a terribly good tracker and tapper. Suddenly I was caught in a deer net..."

_-"What is this?" The hooded man smirked. "An elf in my trap? I didn't think your kin came this far North."_

_"We don't," Legolas answered shortly, still trying to get free of the net. 'What of you? I thought rangers chose to kill their deer, not trap them."_

_"Trap, kill, it's all the same thing." The man dismissed, "Besides, I hunt no deer, but rather some other beast- too quick for my bow."_

_"What is this beast you wish to capture?" Legolas asked, curiosity sparkling in his blue eyes.-_

"He asked me first my name, and in return I asked him his... the answer was one word..."

_-"Strider," the man said.-_

"He told me he had been trying to capture a very speedy boar, and I said to him that I'd help..."

_-Legolas inspected the network from where he was stilled trapped in._

_"This rope is of strong material, but while it captured an elf fine, we are twice, if not thrice, the size of boards. We should make it so the beast is limited in space. Also, these knots are very dependant on one another- should the bor cut one, the entire trap may fall." Legolas went off listing critique._

_Strider stared at him in awe, "I- I never would have thought of that."-_

"We perfected the net and set up the trap..."

_-Two figures crouched in the trees, neither daring to _breath_._

_Some way off, a low squeal was heard, and soon the stamping of stubby legs. They waited silently as the _clunk-cluck _drew nearer, and soon they could see a beast no prettier than an orc._

_Its fur was woven with dried blood and forestry, it's eye a mad, mad reddish-gold, though only in one, as the other was a murky grey-yellow. Its horns were chipped and, in some places, a bit cracked, yellow, but most definitely sharp. And its snout stuck up in the air, to scout the blasted area which it stood._

_Two steps forward, Legolas waited. Two more... when was the trap going to work? One more... SNAP! The board quickly was tied up, squealing and struggling._

_"Legolas! Kill it!" Strider said. Legolas happily obliged, coming down from a tree with a grace only elves posses, then ramming one of his swords into the heart of the beast._

_Strider soon made his way down the tree and inspected the boar, "Nasty little beast, isn't it?"_

_"Indeed," Legolas found himself agreeing._

_"But it is dead. And soon the animals will return to their peaceful, instead of skittish, ways, and we can hunt them again."-_

"He took the boar and dragged it back to wherever rangers came from." Legolas finished up, "And then we didn't cross paths again until later."

Gandalf smiled, "And how did you feel when you met Aragorn?"

Legolas snorted in a manner only an elf who spent too much time with dwarves could achieve. "I felt impressed- the bastard caught an elf in a trap meant for a half-blind _boar_."

"Mhm," Gandalf nodded. "So you didn't feel particularly overjoyed, or, dare I say,_smitten_?"

Legolas rolled his eyes, "Mithrandir, if that is what you are asking, then yes, I _have _come to admire my friend in more ways than one."

"And have you ever..."

"Told anyone, save you, or perhaps you ask if I've told _him_? Both answers are _no_, and I shall die with my secrets, or live eternally with them." Legolas answered without batting an eyelash.

"But you _will_ die with them," Gandalf gasped in realization.

_-Legolas screamed and cried and hated himself. Nothing would stop his breaking heart.-_

"I suppose I will, when the grief bears too much a pain." Legolas shrugged nonchalantly.

_-He buried himself in work far away from any wedding plans- or worse, the king.-_

"He seems rather fond of you, do not doubt yourself in fear." Gandalf said.

"I know his heart yearned for Arwen's eternal love, which she has given him. He needs not me."

_-Legolas mourned of when Aragorn had kept him up many nights, whispering of Arwen's beauty and kindness, and how Legolas wished he was the name that escaped Strider's lips.-_

"He does need you."

_-"I don't need your protection, Legolas! I once had a mother- I do not need you to be mine."-_

"He needs someone who can love him unconditionally, who can bring Gondor an heir, and will stay home to tend to the child. I cannot give him what he needs." Legolas concluded.

Gandalf was silent for a moment, before realizing the truth in the elf's words.

_-"He does not love you."_

_"He does not need you."_

_"He does not_ want _you."_

_Legolas was sure he had begun screaming once more.-_

"So you will fade?" Gandalf asked. "You will put up possibly years of unrequited love, and then fade?"

_-He was so cold and weak. Perhaps he _should _fade. But then he pictures Aragorn's face on the king's wedding night, and remains.-_

"No," Legolas muttered.

"No?" Gandalf inquired.

"I am chilled and sorrowful. My smiles fake and laughs broken. I will not _fade_, I am _fading._"

_-He never imagined that he'd die. Battle was the only thing to kill an save- that or the rare illness/poison, and he had long since mastered the art of acromantula slaying._

_So, when he felt his form flicker, and knew his heart had been shattered, he began to, for the first time, ponder his death.-_

"I had waited out all grief until the war was over, and then until their wedding; it would have killed Aragorn, had I missed it-"

"And yet you're the only one dying." Gandalf cut in.

"Yes, well, I showed up." Legolas gave a bitter chuckle/

Gandalf sighed, "Lay yourself to rest here, Master Elf. I shall explain to the others what has happened- any final requests?"

_-Burning, icy pain clawed his heart._

_"Hated!"_

_"Unwanted!"-_

"Tell them not of whom I grieve for, and apologize on my behalf to my father0 our last meeting was overdue and grim." Legolas decided.

Gandalf nodded and stood up, allowing Legolas all the room he wished.

_-Numbness contrasted greatly with pain, yet both brought an evil misery.-_

Legolas' world unfocused.

_-"Why can I not think?_

_Why can I not see?"-_

His body must have submerged underwater, for he could hear nothing.

_-"Oh Aragorn..."-_

His fingertips and toes tingled.

_-How I loved you..."-_

He felt his spirit pull from his body.

_-"One... last... look..."-_

He never heard the cries of grief.


End file.
